Special
Part 26
by 0083
- The Twenty-Fifth Encounter -
January passed, February came. Heero moved out in the
beginning of February to his new apartment to which I
helped him move, and I was back to living like a
bachelor in my bachelor pad. That is not to say I
didn't miss Heero's presence there, but I was very
relieved to have my place back to myself. I guess I
wasn't really ready to live with anyone, but I take
comfort in the fact that Heero and I made it work
reasonably well. Sure, it wasn't like a well oiled
machine or anything, but after our talk, we hadn't had
any major blow outs.
That aside, Heero and I got along wonderfully. We
talked whenever we had the chance, which didn't seem
to be too much sometimes, and we were progressing
further and further along on the physical side. I
wasn't ready yet for the full, absolute all out kind
of physical intimacy yet, but we were edging closer to
it daily. Not to mention, highly frustrated on the
sexual level, but that's part of the fun. Unless you
were my balls, in which case you cursed me to high
heaven and back on a daily basis.
So, it was with our physical relationship moving
forward and Heero having his own place that it hit me.
Near that day of monstrous pink, the day everyone
calls Valentine's day, I realized that I had not given
Heero his Christmas present. After the mess of
Christmas and the ensuing month of strange situations,
he and I had totally forgotten about the gifts we had
for each other. Oh, I remembered to ship the gift I
got for Solo some time in January only to have it sent
back almost immediately, but I had forgotten Heero's
entirely.
You'd think for that month he was living with me, we
would have remembered, but no. The only thing that
reminded me that I still had that wrapped gift in my
closet was the fact that I began contemplating what to
get him for Valentine's day.
So my dilemma was this... do I pass off the Christmas
present as a valentine's day gift so that I could
avoid shopping yet again or did I go through the pains
of searching the heavens and earth for yet another
perfectish gift? Gah, as if I did not have enough
problems staring at me in the face.. only now do I
realize that there so damn many holidays that you have
to get your loved significant other a gift.
Maybe I could get Heero something for his new
apartment, kind of like a house warming and
Valentine's day gift. Apparently, Relena had not
relinquished much of anything when she had kicked
Heero out of their apartment. Heero had about three
pots, I think. Maybe a set of sheets that could pass
inspection at the local homeless shelter. It wasn't
that he did not like the finer things in life, it was
just that he had problems buying them. My boyfriend
was not a shopper in any sense. I think he hated it
more than me which is saying something.
However, little things like having an apartment that
was so bare that the walls glared off sunlight like
the mirror did not matter to Heero much. These days,
he was just about getting his life back on track and
soothing Milliardo down. Yes, Milliardo had
understood the situation between Heero and Relena and
had tried to be understanding, but it was hard for
him. How could a caring older brother be calm and
cool when his baby sister called him up almost once a
day to cry over her broken and betrayed heart?
Therefore, it was quite near Valentine's day when
Heero and I decided to have a comprehensive and
informative conversation about what the living hell
was going on in our lives. Sure, we were definitely
beating a very dead and decomposing horse with our
planned conversation, but so what? Sometimes it
helped to overkill on a topic in order to come to a
solution of sorts. Besides, I had that Christmas gift
problem still and I wanted to give it to him without
causing too much of a fuss.
The talk, for some inexplicable reason, was at Heero's
place. We had a bottle of chardonnay, a cheese plate
and some good liver pate laid out on the floor of his
very sparse apartment. Why the floor? He had yet to
get a coffee table. Or an end table. Hell, he had no
tables. He had no chairs. He had a bed, which was
good for him, and a television set that looked as if
it dated back to the moon landing. Again, I had to
wonder how he had managed to live like this for nearly
two weeks without going insane.
"Heero," I said with a mouthful of cheese, "I know
you're a big fan of Spartan, but this is ridiculous.
I know people in prisons with more shit than you."
"I thought we were going to discuss how to fix our
relationships with people we cared about, not about my
extreme lack of furnishing."
There was a tinge of laughter in his voice, but I
couldn't let it go with good humor. Nobody should
live like this.
"Yes, we will do the talk, but Heero, look around.
You've been here nearly two weeks. It's not that much
trouble to buy a couch, is it?"
"Oh, I don't know," Heero replied, "after all, I had
thought that the couch I had at my old place was the
last couch I was ever going to buy. But Relena
refuses to hand it over."
"Divorces are more civilized," I mumbled unhappily,
"and they split stuff up. Shouldn't you and Relena at
least discuss the separation of property?"
"Sure, we should. But it's hard to have a proper
discussion about who gets the couch and the doilies
when one of the parties is too busy crying and
cursing."
I sigh in exasperation. How long did it take to get
over someone, really?
"Man, Heero, it has been over a month since she found
out. Don't tell me she's still pissed at you."
"Well," Heero said thoughtfully, "they say it takes
half the time you were with your boyfriend to get over
him."
I wave my hand at him to continue, but he just
crunches up his eyebrows in thought.
"So... How long have you two been.. uh, together?"
"As close as I can determine it, Relena has thought I
loved her for.. ten years."
Ten years? Jesus on a stick, that's longer than most
marriages!
"So you're telling me," I say, not keeping the
incredulity out of my voice, "Relena won't be rational
about you for five years?"
"As nearly as my mathematical skills tell me, yes."
Huh. That's just so absurd that I don't know what to
say. I mean, sure, getting over someone is hard, but
really, was it that hard? Then I think to myself, how
long would it take me to get over Heero if we ever did
break up? How long would it take me to stop loving
him? After all, I've only been with him for a few
months now and we hadn't even had sex. According to
his math, I should get over him in about four months
or so, but would I really get over him in that time if
we broke up right now?
"Doesn't seem so unreasonable, does it?" Heero says
to me, his eyes lit with an understanding. He gets
it. He understands why Relena is the way she is, why
getting his things from her aren't so critical. After
all, he still cares about her and feels truly bad
about the whole situation.
"Poor girl," I say, really feeling for her, "you are
pretty hard to forget, I guess."
"I'm glad to know."
We share a small laugh and munch on more cheese. I
suppose we are talking about what is wrong with the
people in our lives. Or rather, what went wrong with
them.
"So, Heero, how long does it take a brother to get
over his little brother's sexual orientation switch?"
"I wish I knew," he replies in all earnestness, "but
there does not seem to be a math for that. I'm sorry
Solo is still upset with you."
I shrug. I suppose I can't help it, you know? Solo
feels the way he feels. I feel the way I feel. The
only thing we can do is meet half way, but neither of
us really knows the road or the direction. My brother
and I.. the way we feel about the current situation
isn't even on the same map.
"Hey, it's not as bad as Relena hating your guts. You
lost her and your relationship with Milliardo is
strained. It can't be easy on you."
Really, there isn't much to say after that. Sure, we
wanted to have a deep talk about our problems, but the
problems themselves aren't really that complicated.
They are simple and therein lay our greatest obstacle.
Simple problems were usually the hardest to solve.
"So," Heero says suddenly, "I thought we should have a
romantic Valentine's day."
If he wants to change the subject, who am I to argue?
"We should," I say, "and who knows" Maybe you'll get
lucky."
I smile slyly at Heero, sending a much used seductive
leer at his direction. My seductive leer looks
somewhat like this: my violet eyes become a deep
shade of purple, half hidden by my heavy lids, my lips
quirk in a half grin that invites a kiss and my head
tilts at a slight angle to show off my neck. Girls
used to go nuts over the leer when I used it on them
and I used to get a surge of sexual power. When used
on Heero.. I get a sharp and penetrating sense of
desire, hunger and raw energy. Why? Because he looks
at me as if I was the only person on earth, as if he
wanted to sink his teeth into me.
"Lucky," he whispers huskily, edging closer to me,
"would be good."
I'm still looking at him with seduction written all
over my face, but it's no longer the practiced look I
used in flirting. No, now it is a genuine one and it
is reflected on Heero's face as well.
Here we are, sitting on the hard wood floor of Heero's
bare apartment with a snack tray between us, staring
at each other with a lazy, fiery seduction lighting
our eyes. I don't even know what is keeping us from
jumping on each other, except that..
Anticipation. That moment before the act of desire.
That electric sliver of time filled with intense
longing, hot fires of passion. The breathless wait
just before the contact, the thudding of hearts in
syncopated rhythm..
When our lips do touch, it's an explosion. An
overflow of lust and love, mingled with a need so
desperate that it transcends mere touching and
kissing.
For a while, we forget about Relena, about Solo, about
gifts and Valentine's and everything else. We forget
that there is no furniture, that there are no
curtains. We only know what our lips feel, our
fingers explore.
For a long, long while.. there is just Heero, me, and
our desire.
It's rather too bad that it does not end with naked
bodies and sweaty pumping bodies. But then again..
maybe it's that anticipation thing.
What it does end with is two extremely excited men
trying to catch their breaths on the cold, hard floor.
I notice that I am without a shirt and Heero has
somehow managed to get his sweater caught around his
throat.
"I think I'm going to have some serious groin pains."
Heero laughs throatily and licks my collarbone. I
can't help the moan... hell, I'm so aroused right now
that it's a wonder that the little Duo who is not so
little, by the way, isn't jumping out of my pants.
"You should just let go of your issues and sleep with
me."
So says Heero and I have heard worse suggestions. But
I'm not ready yet. Honestly, you'd think if I'm this
turned on and my body is reacting this violently to
his touch, I'd be crazy stupid not to jump into the
sac with him.
"I should, and I definitely will," I say, running my
hands up and down his bare torso, "but not tonight. I
swear, I'm not trying to be a tease. I hate that."
Heero buries his head in my throat and laughs. His
laughter rumbles against my throat and sends a
pleasantly warm tingling down my stomach to my already
rock solid erection. I don't mind, not really. It's
a good feeling, if you like pain alongside your
pleasure.
"I know you aren't a tease," he says as he rocks his
hips against mine, "but I can't help but suggest every
now and then that we just.. fuck each other stupid."
"Oh, we will. I will definitely make your IQ drop to
the levels of the local politicians one day. But I'm
not quite ready to face the fact that you only have
one place I can go."
He laughs some more than levers himself off my and
sits a bit away. That is a wise move, of course. Had
he stayed on top of me, who knows what the hell I
would have done?
"I can wait."
"Thanks, Heero. So, you want your Christmas present?"
Well, that came out of nowhere, but I needed to say
something to keep my hands off him, right?
"Christmas?" he replies with a tilted eyebrow, "wasn't
that a while back ago? You know, when everything went
to hell?"
"Yep," I say with aplomb, "but you see, I never gave
you your gift. I spent days agonizing over it and you
never even got it. Bummer, right?"
"I never gave you your gift either, did I?" He says
with sudden understanding.
"Nope. So you want it or should I just turn it into
your V-day gift?"
"You wouldn't cheat me like that, would you?" Heero
asks with mock hurt in his voice which sends me
laughing.
"Sure I would! I'm an attorney, aren't I?"
We share a good laugh and wait for our desires to
lessen. We take the time to rearrange our clothing
and settle into the comfortable feeling before talking
to each other again. It is getting harder and harder
to deny myself and Heero the extreme pleasure of
sexual gratification, but I'd rather not regret it by
doing it too soon. After all, Heero isn't someone I'm
going to leave in the bed in the middle of the night.
He's special, don't you know?
I wander over to my jacket after our desires abate
somewhat, fishing out the nicely wrapped gift out of
the pocket while Heero retrieves something from his
bedroom. When we are seated on the floor from across
each other once more, I hand him his belated gift and
he hands me mine. With a wonder that I haven't had
for opening gifts since I was a child, I unwrap the
blue and silver foil off the box and discover..
An anime DVD I had not had a chance to buy. My eyes
light up and my lips tilt in a maddening grin. I had
only mentioned this title in passing, very casually,
only once long in the past. He had remembered. Damn,
he's good.
For his part, Heero carefully undid the gold trimmed
wrapping on his gift to fish out a small, crystal
figurine. He holds it in his hand and turns it every
which way, letting the light refract off it in
rainbows.
"It's a bird." I say, my voice suddenly a bit nervous
when he says nothing.
"It's a hawk in flight, the lady said. You know, how
the wings are spread and all that."
I babble on and on about the quality of the crystal,
the workmanship some overpaid Swiss guy put into it,
the exquisite detail of the wingspan.. You get the
picture. I'm stopped in the middle of my rambling by
Heero's lips suddenly on mine, sucking out my breath
and thought.
"You.." Heero says quietly after he's done kissing me
breathless, "you remembered."
Yeah, there's a story there. Once, before I even
acknowledged that I liked Heero, during that fateful
trial, we had had that single talk. You know, while I
was prepping him for the witness stand. He had said,
somewhere between clinical analysis, that if there was
one thing he really wanted in life was to fly free.
Like a hawk in flight.
So there it is. We both remember little things about
each other. Things so damned trivial and little,
yet.. they mean so much. Put in that light, the
problems with Relena and Solo.. they aren't so
grandiose. They aren't so hard to overcome or fix.
Because if it is so easy for us to remember and do the
little things right, it can't be that hard to do the
big things.
That's the logic, right?
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