Disclaimer: I do not meddle in the affairs of Gundam Wing, for I am penniless and own no copyrights.
Pairings: 2+1, 1+Laptop
Category: Humor
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Dishonorable intentions, naughty language, misuse of illegal fireworks, Heero suffering withdrawals, senseless acts of vandalism, no point whatsoever.
Spoilers: None.
Feedback: All responses are subject to unabashed worship.
Notes: I was minding my own business one night, making falafel at my mom's cozy west-coast apartment and listening to the evening news, when combined musings on the New York blackout and my two favorite anime boys combined to form this fic. No irreverence intended towards those who were actually caught in the blackout, cause I know from personal experience that being in a city without power in the dead of summer sucks big time.
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Disconnected
by Casey Valhalla
"Hey Heero, you’re in here, right?"
Silence.
The dorm room was pitch black, not a shred of light filtering through the small window or from the open doorway. It was ten p.m. and the blackout had spread throughout the entire southern end of the city, leaving the boarding school dark and quiet save for the occasional spurts of laughter and shouting as the dorm’s occupants took advantage of the situation. Duo fumbled through his pockets for his zippo. He himself had spent the last several hours working the power outage to his benefit, sabotaging the school’s surveillance system and setting a bug in the computer network that would take effect as soon as the system rebooted.
In short, he was currently feeling *very* self-satisfied, and had his sights set on taking advantage of a completely different situation – in the relative anonymity provided by total darkness.
Regardless of which, he still had the self-preservation to announce himself before entering the room he shared with one very high-strung Gundam pilot.
The zippo flicked on, throwing long shadows onto the walls and providing enough dim light to locate the emergency candles on the dresser. And to see that Heero was sitting at his desk chair, still as a statue, staring pointedly at the blank screen of his laptop as though he could provide power to the machine by will alone.
"Heero?"
Silence.
"Backup power run out?"
Silence.
Duo sighed in resignation – a common occurrence in his partner’s presence – and lit a few of the candles before venturing further into the little room. "No sense in brooding over it, yanno. No one knows when the power’s gonna come back on, so you might as well enjoy it while it lasts."
Silence.
"Oh, come on. You could go outside and check out the UFO’s. There’s about five of them circling the school."
Silence.
"One of them touched down, yanno. An alien took over my brain and sent me here to give you an anal probe and steal your kidneys."
…
"…what?"
"Ah! Now that I have your undivided attention, why don’t you stop sitting there like a zombie and help me blow something up or commit an equally destructive act?"
"…no."
Duo groaned and dropped to the floor, waving a candle in Heero’s general direction. "You’re impossible. That thing isn’t going anywhere, and even if it was capable of spontaneous movement, it doesn’t have any power. Come on. Security is seriously slack tonight and I still have that stock of unsafe and insane fireworks left over from new year’s."
"…can’t … leave … terminal …"
"Heero?"
His fists were clenching and unclenching at his sides, and he had yet to avert his stare from the laptop’s screen. "… must … have … internet … access …"
Duo didn’t hesitate. He recognized the warning symptoms of a net-junkie going into withdrawals. He clambered to his feet, setting the candles safely out of the way, and lifted Heero bodily from the chair, setting him down on his feet to face him. Heero’s eyes were wide, the pupils dilated, staring at Duo without seeing him. Duo took a step back, the better to avoid retaliation should it occur, and slapped Heero hard across the face.
Heero, in turn, recoiled, then shook himself, and gingerly raised a hand to his cheek. He blinked and took in Duo’s presence, stanced and ready for a fight. "Oh. Thanks. I needed that.
Duo relaxed and crossed his arms, regarding him with a look bordering dangerously on Shinigami Mode(TM). "Hell yeah you did. Hey!" He grabbed Heero by the shoulder as his gaze began wandering back towards the computer. "None of that. We’re going out. You’re going to cause some minor explosions and get your mind off that damned laptop. Got it?"
Heero nodded slowly, almost dazed. "Yeah…"
Duo snapped his fingers in front of his eyes. "Wake up! Come on, think mission. Mission!"
"Mission…"
"Your mission is to shoot bottle rockets into as many open windows you can find, set off M-80’s behind the girls’ dorm, graffiti the fountain in the center square and screw me silly in a janitor’s closet. Got that?"
He stared into middle space and mumbled the parameters under his breath. "Bottle rockets … open windows … M-80’s … girl’s dorm … graffiti … fountain … scre—WHAT?" Heero’s eyes, suddenly coherent, snapped to Duo.
He chuckled. "Just making sure you were listening."
"Duo—"
"Okay, so I wasn’t, but still—"
"Duo—"
"I’m not about to let you sit here and waste away staring at that fucking thing—
"DUO!"
"Yeah?"
"Mission accepted."
"Oh…"
All feedback is treated with the gushing thanks it deserves.
Cheers and Unrestricted Internet Access,
Casey
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