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Damsel in Distress versus the Knight in Shiny Armor
Chapter 18 - Gimme Some Injustice, You Sexy Stud-Beast
by Muffie


Heero couldn't get the glare off of his face. He knew it was inappropriate, but there wasn't much he could do about it. Apparently, weddings were supposed to be happy events of some sort, but all he could see were illustrations of coyly smiling females in dresses. This nonsense didn't apply since his bride-to-be was male. He slapped shut Weddings for Dummies, Assorted Idiots & Grooms and picked up The Knot's Guide to Weddings, which was conveniently jacketed by Wufei's The Art of the Japanese Sword. Wufei hadn't yet noticed that his sword book was wearing The Knot's Guide to Weddings jacket. Of course, Wufei had yet to return from studying at the library last night so he likely hadn't noticed Heero's appropriation of his personal items for use in tactical misdirection.

The section on wedding vows caught his eye almost immediately. Several of them directly mentioned forsaking all others. There were variations on that theme, involving things that he liked, such as "keep yourself only unto him", though he would change the vow to unto Heero to cover all bases. He liked that. Forsaking all others, keep yourself only unto Heero Yuy, pilot 01, until death do you part. No, no, death was too soon. Forsaking all others, keep yourself only unto Heero Yuy, pilot 01, forever. And ever. The only downside was that every choice of wedding vow mentioned the word love. While he would prefer to hear his baka promise to love him forever and ever, he couldn't, in good conscience, do the--

"...Miss Yau?"

Heero glared at the teacher.

"The answer?"

He glared harder.

She attempted to look stern. "Miss Yau."

The answer? There was only one reasonable answer. "My baka had better forsake all others or I'll break his neck."

The teacher blinked. Then blinked again. She squinted at Heero's glare, then turned to the student sitting next to him. "Mr. Strother? Why is a split infinitive considered bad grammar?"

Heero turned back to the wedding book.

Love? What is love? The Princess Relena's Art of Courtly Love business had quite a bit to say about this love. "Love is an inborn suffering proceeding from the sight and immoderate thought upon the beauty of the other sex." No, this definitely did not apply. Heero was not particularly fond of the other sex. There were a few, such as Noin who could fight like hell, but other than that, he held these crying, overly emotional, bishounen obsessed creatures under a great deal of suspicion. Baron J said that they weren't to be trusted, these females; they were flighty, undependable, and unreasonably finicky. Noin said that this was because Baron J couldn't get laid in a whorehouse with this week's winning powerball lottery ticket taped to his forehead. From what Heero had seen of the Horde and the Princess Relena, he was more inclined to side with Baron J. Perhaps Heero should suggest that Baron J enter a whorehouse with liquid funds, rather than a lottery ticket. Whores undoubtedly preferred payment in cash.

Inborn suffering? That was rather confusing. From the romances that he'd been recently subjected to, Heero had been under the impression that love was something that caused its participants to behave like idiots. While it was quite all right for his baka to behave like an idiot, he was certainly not permitted to have inborn suffering or perhaps this immoderate thought, whatever that was. Anyone or anything that made his baka have inborn suffering would have to answer to him and one or both of his .50 AEs and several fully loaded clips of ammo. Maybe a beam cannon while he was at it. And a small, thermonuclear detonation. There would be no inborn suffering for his baka. Once he figured out what this immoderate thought was, he would decide if it was all right for his baka to experience or not.

Of course, the source of this information was the Princess Relena. She couldn't really be considered reliable. She'd been wrong about several things, the largest of which was the gender of her sibling. Perhaps he ought to verify this love thing with something more informative than the dictionary.

He frowned and slammed the book shut. Love was a romantic notion. He was a soldier. He did not do romantic notions. He planned on using his baka prudently as a soldier as well, since he had obvious talent in demolitions, so his baka didn't do romantic notions either. At least he wouldn't once they married and he had extracted the "I will obey and forsake all others and keep myself only unto Heero Yuy, pilot 01, forever and ever" vows from his baka.

Though, he really shouldn't leave love out of the wedding vows since they appeared in every one he'd seen so far. Most of what he'd read had indicated he could write his own version of these vows, so he would simply change "promise to love" to something more reasonable. Perhaps "love as appropriate for whatever mission is current". Yes, he liked that and it was sufficiently close to the traditional vow that even his baka would recognize it.

Satisfied with his new plan, Heero abruptly smiled at the teacher. For once, someone actually smiled back at him.

.
Later, on the way to detention....
.

"Detention is so fucking stupid. You know they get their panties in a bunch if I talk? It's like they made it a felony or something? C'mon, do I look like I could ever commit a felony?" Duo blinked huge, purple eyes at him and he found it a bit hard to concentrate.

"You committed a felony to get detention, baka."

Duo glared at him. "Ha! Mr. Nye should get his ass in detention forever! Using low grade shit like that is a frickin' felony. He probably gets his shit from Acme."

Heero frowned. "Acme? I will check for future reference as a supplier and submit my recommendations to Baron J."

"You know, Acme, where Wile E. Coyote is always buying the stuff that blows up in his face instead of catching the road runner? Where the hell have you been, under a rock? Looney Tunes has been out for hundreds of years, ya know. Everyone watches antique cartoons these days."

"Who is Wile E. Coyote? Why would he want to catch a road runner?"

His baka whacked him gently on the head with a knuckle. "Hello, Yuy, anyone home, Yuy? It's a cartoon."

He knew what a cartoon was; he wasn't stupid. Of course, his not-princess was adorable when he got frustrated, so Heero stared at him blankly.

"Aargh!"

He found himself smiling at the flailing arms, wildly swinging braid, and the exaggerated "why me?" face. For the second time, someone actually smiled back. That girl. It wasn't his baka, though, so he didn't particularly care. "Baka." He poked Duo in the ribs to get his attention. It also made his not-princess giggle, but he firmly told himself that wasn't why he chose to do it. "Can I rescue you from detention?"

Duo smiled. "That would be great! Are you gonna tell the teacher demon that I've got a sucking chest wound, too? I would kill to see the look on a teacher demon's face when you whip out that," Duo blushed, "gun of yours."

That brought to mind the candlelit room with a mostly naked not-princess and the warmth of gun oil and the friction of the slide rubbing through his hands. After last night, the incident took on an entirely new meaning. One he'd very much like to try with a completely naked not-princess. "I would rather you whipped out my gun," he said.

"Hee-chan, are you flirting with me?"

Flirting? If that's whatever it was that he'd done to make his baka dimple up with a sweet smile, then he planned on doing it a lot. He let the stupid nickname pass and nodded. "Is it working?"

"Wanna play hooky with me?"

Reiko Tempestuous Muerte looked startled. "Hooky? You can't!"

Hooky? Hooky! Soldiers did not play hooky. AWOL went entirely against everything inside of him. He shuddered to think of the very notion of the merest idea thinking about the possibility of perhaps, just maybe catching a taxi to cross his mind.

The not-princess licked his lips and made eye contact with the front of Heero's skirt.

"Yes. I will play hooky with you."

His baka grinned. He flicked open his mental thesaurus and chose beautiful, sexy, and erectile. The grin widened and his baka brushed up against him. Hot, moist breath washed over his neck and nuzzled his ear. "I'll take that as a compliment, lover, but you might want to hold your books down low in front."

Puzzled, he looked down. So did Reiko Tempestuous Muerte. She gasped. "Oh gods! You're a boy!"

He glared at the horizontal plane that had suddenly popped up in his skirt. "This is your fault, baka."

The baka didn't seem to realize that being at fault was a bad thing. "Glad to hear it, Heero."

"Oh, Duo, you poor thing," Reiko Tempestuous Muerte mourned. "Locked in forbidden, taboo love. So sweet, yet so doomed by the tide of public opinion rising against you."

"What in the hell are you talking about?" Duo glared at her.

She clasped her hands together and held them to her chest. "The love that dare not speak its name; the love that flies in the face of every socially acceptable custom there is; the love that must stand in the face of derision." She looked around, then hissed, "Heterosexual love."

"Are you insane?" Heero thought that was a perfectly reasonable inquiry, considering.

She put her hands on her hips. "I would ask the same thing of you, dress boy. There's no point in trying to hide your het love if you're going to wear a skirt and Duo is going to wear pants. You both should be in pants."

Heero frowned. "I wished to disguise my gender. It would be inappropriate to wear pants."

"Yeah, but boy-boy love is just so much sexier than girl-girl love!"

Duo grimaced. "Great, another fangirl. If you start trying to touch my hair, I'm going to strangle you."

She looked hurt. "Don't you recognize me, Duo?"

"No."

"You used to call me your little Sunshine."

"Sorry, no."

"After Solo died in our arms, and you called yourself Duo and I called myself Reiko for him. You were two and I was three."

"Reiko means child of grace," Heero said, "not three."

She ignored him. "We ran the streets for a while; I was your co-leader. Don't you remember?"

His baka was staring at the girl as if she were a polka dotted toad.

"Then the Alliance captured us, after I saved you from that pimp who was about to rape you and make you his prize whore. We were sent to Maxwell Church. Remember how we used to curl up on your bunk and just hold each other whenever one of the other gang was adopted? We promised that we'd always stay together and watch each other's back. Remember?"

"Have you thought about psychiatric help?"

"Oh, Duo! Don't you remember when we went and stole the mobile suit, after the rebels held the orphans hostage? We came back to find nearly everyone dead. Sister Helen died in your arms and Sister Bernstein died in mine. See, we have matching crosses. It was so awful, you almost killed yourself before I saved you and made you promise that you'd live, if only to watch over me. We ran the streets for a while after that, but it wasn't the same. You lived for revenge, so you hid aboard a Sweeper ship. You wanted me to stay safe, remember? So you found a family to take me in."

"I hear they're doing wonders with drug therapy for psychos."

She clenched her fists and looked at her feet for a moment. "What you didn't know was that the family was a front. I was taken in by a scientist. She was a prot‚g‚ of Professor G's. Sensai R was a genius and G had been jealous of that, so he kicked her out. She trained me to be a gundam pilot. I thought you were safe with the Sweepers, until that fateful day."

His baka grabbed his hand and began to subtly manoeuver them away from her all the while nodding politely.

"You were fighting Oz in Deathscythe Hell, and you were about to self-destruct because there were just too many and you were almost out of power. You'd lost your thermal scythe and only had a few rounds of ammo left. I came in my gundam, Blackdeath Starshine, and saved you. Remember?" She sniffled and rubbed at her eye. "Oz captured you a few weeks later, while I was taking on Zechs over the Arctic Base. After I defeated him, and let him go in peace, he really is an honorable warrior, I came for you. I rescued you from that base in Tibet where they were gonna rape you and turn you into their little whore slave. It wasn't easy since Blackdeath Starshine was out of commission after the battle with Zechs."

"You battled Zechs?" Heero frowned and jerked Duo to a halt.

Reiko Tempestuous Muerte glared at him. So did Duo, presumably for ending their getaway. She took a step forward. "Of course I did. He's the best Oz has to offer. I'm also Duo's long lost betrothed." She smiled at Duo. "Solo wanted us to get married, remember?"

Heero's trigger fingers twitched in tandem. "Negative. The baka marries no one but me."

The not-princess poked him in the belly to get his attention. He glowered. The baka didn't have to use his fist for it. "Heero, that," Duo pointed at Reiko Tempestuous Muerte, "is a fangirl or worse. Rescue me, goddammit."

"You will let me rescue you?"

"Yes! Now hurry the fuck up before I do it myself and go play hooky without you!"

Reiko Tempestuous Muerte glared at them both. "No need, Duo. I can see that there's no talking to you while he's around. I'll catch up to you later."

"Not if I see you coming," Duo said.

She looked back over her shoulder and sniffed haughtily. "You'll get yours, Duo Maxwell, or my name isn't Reiko Tempestuous Muerte. Er, or my name is Reiko Tempestuous Muerte. Bwa-ha-ha-ha-ha!"

Duo blinked. Heero palmed the butts of his .50 AEs through his indecently and unrealistically short skirt. They both glared at her departing back. "That was straight freaky."

Straight freaky? Heero vaguely wondered if that was a euphemism for stupid non-sensical death threat.

"C'mon, Spandex Boy, rescue me from detention."

.
Back at Heero's dorm room....
.

"C'mon Heero!" Duo bellowed. "Before a friggin' teacher shows up and you gotta go and rescue me again."

Heero shot a glare at his closed door, shoved his gay sex manuals beneath his bed and covered them with Wufei's pillow for good measure. He smoothed his blankets one last time and bounced a fifty cent piece off of his precisely made bed. Quarters were for sissies. Satisfied that his area was as presentable as possible, he opened the door and let his baka in.

His baka stomped in and promptly dropped himself squarely in the center of Heero's ex-perfectly made bed. "Man, Heero, it's not like I've never been in here before or anything. And you flashed me your panties twice today so it's not like I haven't seen your skivvies, either."

Heero leveled his deadliest death glare at his not-princess. "I am unable to wear my shorts beneath this skirt."

"Easy, there, buddy. I was just saying that you don't have to break your back cleaning up the place for me."

Curiously enough, that statement was perfectly clear. Perhaps he was beginning to understand his baka a little bit better. His baka abruptly sprawled back on his bed, braid flailing about before landing with a soft thump to trail towards him in what he hoped was an open invitation. Should his ask first or should he just remove his clothing and jump on his baka? He eyed the long length of his not-princess's body and tried to recall what the sex manuals had said regarding initiating sexual encounters. His previous experience wasn't helpful since it had either come about accidentally or the not-princess had started it. Perhaps he should contrive to make something accidental? How would--

"What in the fuck is Wu Wu doing with a wedding book and S & M books?"

--he best accomplish an accidental sexual encounter missio--wait one. Wedding?

Heero pasted the blankest expression he could onto his face. "I'm sure that I have no idea why Chang has a wedding book."

The not-princess sat up and eyed him suspiciously. "It is the Feimeister's wedding book, isn't it?"

Heero stared very hard at a point on the not-princess's forehead. "Of course."

Before he could intercept and redirect the not-princess's attention to something else, the not-princess had bounded past him and ripped the book from the shelf. He'd forgotten just how damned fast the baka really was when he set his mind to it.

"Yuy, why does Wuffy have a wedding book jacket on his sword book?"

"Misdirection."

"His or yours?"

Heero blinked. "His."

The baka's eyes narrowed. "Wufei, the manliest misogynist in existence, is hiding a manly sword book inside a girly book jacket that has a picture of an onna in a lacy wedding gown?"

It did sound a little ridiculous when he put it that way. Still. Heero squared his shoulders and gave his baka a look that practically dared him to argue with such blunt fact as he was stating. "Yes?"

A pinched expression settled over Duo's face and his mouth dropped open. Before he could get a word out, the door opened and admitted Trowa followed closely by Quatre. The baka's outrage turned to amusement as Quatre put himself squarely between Heero and Trowa. Heero glared at them both. This put his plans regarding an accidental sexual encounter with his baka out.

Quatre glared back at him. "You stay away fro -- you're staying with Duo, remember?"

Heero crossed his arms over his chest and deepened his glare, though he suspected his pink sailor style dress rendered it less than effective. At least Quatre hadn't mentioned the wedding book.

Trowa's eye narrowed on Duo's hands. "What are you doing with Heero's wedding book?"

"I knew it!" Duo shoved the book back into Wufei's shelf and rounded on Heero. "I thought we'd settled this, Yuy! I'm not marrying you!"

"You were misinformed."

"I heard you call off the stupid mission, plain as fucking day!"

"Explain to me what a honeymoon is."

Duo glowered. "Oh no you don't. I'm not stupid, Yuy."

"You were misinformed, baka."

"Then you explain it, if you're so fucking smart."

"Very well. A honeymoon is a short period after the marriage ceremony where the newly married couple goes to a vacation spot for one to four weeks in order to have sex."

Quatre frowned thoughtfully. "Heer--"

"So fucking what! Then they come home and their gonads dry up! It ain't fuckin happening to me!"

"It would simplify many things if we married." Heero calmly explained to himself that he was not frustrated.

"It would simplify us right into celibacy! I don't do celibacy!" Duo strangled the end of his braid between his hands.

Quatre's thoughtful frown deepened a little. "Du--"

"Of course you do celibacy!" Heero wasn't yelling; he had more control over himself than that. "You're a virgin!"

"And you have to scream it so every frickin' body knows now!"

"There is nothing wrong with being a virgin," Heero ground out between clenched teeth. Anyone who thought there was anything wrong with virginity was going to get pummeled and then shot. Not only was his baka a virgin, but so was he.

"Yes there is!" Duo roared. "I'm still a virgin and that's a major fucking problem for me!"

"And you'd better stay that way until we have sex!" Heero roared back.

"Don't you go fucking telling me what to goddamned do, Yuy! You don't own me!"

"I don't want to own you, I want to--"

A piercing whistled echoed through the room. "What is the meaning of this injustice?" It didn't quite have the same bite as it usually did since smug satiation replaced offended indignation in both Wufei's voice and body language.

Heero blinked and Duo openly gaped as Wufei glided across the room and sat on his bed. He grinned at all of them. Quatre and Trowa exchanged knowing glances.

"I think he's sick," Duo said quietly.

Trowa choked on a snort and bent over, coughing. Quatre turned an interesting shade of pink and patted Trowa on the back. Wufei attempted to frown reprovingly at Duo, but it came out wrong.

"God, he's really sick! C'mon, Tro-dude, quit hacking up a lung and go get a doctor. Wuffers is smiling!"

"I'm fine, Maxwell," Wufei said with what could only be described as a dreamy sigh. "Most wonderfully, fabulously, blissfully, deliriously fine."

Trowa's coughing fit grew sufficiently violent to knock him to the floor. The coughing sounded suspiciously like laughter.

Duo managed to effectively combine shock, envy, and sorrow in one expression. "Oh. My. God. Chang Wufei got laid."

Wufei smirked.

"Wufei got laid!"

"You said as much, baka," Heero grumbled.

"Wufei has the personality of a fucking rat trap and he manages to get laid and I don't? It's your fault, Heero. You're my boyfriend, goddammit."

"Ninmu ryoukai." Yes, this was a mission he could get into.

"Wha -- ahhh! Leggo the hair!"

Heero ignored the screeching and marched directly to Duo's dorm room. Duo jogged to keep up until he noticed their destination, then grabbed Heero's hand and tugged him along faster. Heero slammed the door shut behind them and locked it, watching Duo cross to the bed. He was shedding clothing along the way. Heero heartily approved of this. He verified the locks on the windows, shut the blinds, and started peeling out of his own clothing. He paused with a pair lace and ribbon panties stolen from Wufei's underwear drawer hanging out around his knees.

Duo had lost the hair band somewhere and turned toward Heero in a sensuous, seductive shimmy. Slowly, his long, sensuous fingers caressed their way through his hair, unraveling the braid that contained the glorious reddish golden chestnut with gorgeous shampoo-commercial highlights mass that was Duo's sensuous tresses. He shook his head, sending his luxurious locks cascading about his slender, pale, naked, lithe yet strong boy's body like a golden chestnut waterfall of silky soft tresses. His luminous orbs of jeweled amethystine cobalt gleamed in sensuous seductiveness. His hands reached back, separating the two side sections of his glorious reddish chestnut mass of silk and pulling them over his shoulders to cloak his chest and tickle at his knees.

"It's going to get tangled." Heero did not want to hear the baka complain loudly about tangles.

"If you hadn't've yanked my braid out to start with, we wouldn't be having the friggin' conversation, asshole. We need to have us a little talk called don't pull my hair!" He deftly added a twist or two to the front sections, then started weaving the glorious reddish go--his damned hair already into a tight braid. "It's not a leash, ya know. You jerk on it like that and you're gonna pull all my shit out and I'll be damned before you'll fuck it into a mess."

Heero felt a little queasy. "I didn't touch your shit."

"It's an expression, Yuy! Fuck, don't you watch MTV?"

"No." Had he been anyone else, he would have wilted in relief. As it was, he did accidentally rip some of the ribbon material on Wufei's panties. He hoped Wufei would not notice. He pulled off the skirt and ripped off the blouse, nearly strangling himself on the pink tie before he tore the material.

"Not in a hurry, are you, Hee-chan?" Duo had tied off his braid and stood, hands on hips, smirking.

"We will have sex now."

The smirk grew into a grin. "You betcher ass, babe."

"Do you have a coin?"

Duo blinked. "Coin?"

"Yes, jyan ken pon would be a more efficient means of determination."

Duo blinked again, his grin drooping a little under the pressure. "Determination?"

"Who will be on the top."

"Oh, that's easy. I will. Nothing says 'I'm all bottom' like spandex shorts."

Heero snorted and crossed his arms over his chest. "I disagree. I believe that your ownership of a tiara makes you more of a bottom."

"Oh you did not just go there!"

Heero grunted dismissively. "Jyan ken pon?"

Duo scratched his head and glowered. "That's about as romantic as a road accident."

"I do not like romantic."

Duo shrugged and stuck his closed fist out. "What the fuck ever. Let's get this over with."

Heero smirked and very carefully did not mention that he was the jyan ken pon champion of Baron J's holdings. "Jyan ken pon!"

Heero's eyes widened. He lost! He lost! Duo, the obviously paper sort of soldier, had thrown out rock. Heero's scissors were as crushed as he suddenly felt.

"Looks like you're catching, Hee-chan!"

"Best two out of three."

His not-princess just laughed. "Bottoms up, baby."

No....

"C'mon Hee-chan, you sexy stud-beast. Gimme some injustice."

"Injustice?"

"Y'know, kinky-hot man to man sex. What ol' Wuff the Magic Dragon was all about last night."

"Ninmu ryoukai." Heero swallowed the lump of trepidation in his throat, squared his shoulders, marched to the bed, and dropped to all fours, butt hiked up into the air.

"God," his not-princess whispered moments before placing his hands gently on the curve of Heero's ass. Heero decided that he liked the sensation and leaned into it. His baka groaned curse words he preferred not to think about, and trailed his fingers slowly along his flesh, leaving a wake of sensation behind. "Fuck, Heero, you have the most perfect ass in existence."

Heero frowned. "Is that as good as a cute butt?"

"Better! So much fucking better."

He could feel his baka's hot breath washing over the flesh of his butt. He'd read about it, in the sex manuals, that men often paid oral homage to their partner's rumps. Would his baka show him what rimming was like? Duo's tongue touched the underside of his rear, where the curve of his left buttock met the top of his left thigh. He locked his throat, but a moan escaped anyway.

"Roll over," Duo growled, tugging at his hips.

He flipped onto his back, briefly disappointed. No rimming tutorial. And then his baka slithered his tongue over his belly button and the disappointment shattered like a glass dropped from the top of the highest turret. Grabbing his baka by the braid, he slowly reeled that beautiful face closer, until he could reach it with his lips. He pressed kisses to the forehead, then the nose, and then plunged his tongue deep into his baka's mouth. Duo groaned into him, pressing his entire body down onto Heero's. And, oh, it was goood.

His brain short-circuited and he thought that this was a good thing. His baka was sucking on his tongue again and it made his hips jerk upwards for some strange and exquisitely intense feeling reason. He did it again, and again. His penis was hard. No, his cock. His baka liked the word cock. He said it all the time. Heero suddenly fell in lust with the word himself. He was rubbing his cock against his baka and nothing in the world felt better. Except for his baka's tongue worming its way into his mouth. He moaned and thrust again, rolling his hands down the smooth slope of his baka's back to grab those taut butt cheeks. He could feel the muscles rippling in his baka's butt as he slowly rocked himself against Heero's cock. And it was thrust. No, cock. No. It was good. Yes, good. It was so good that his cock was throbbing like it had an electrical charge running through it.

"Fuck, Heero, you're hot," Duo groaned, ripping his mouth away to nip at Heero's jaw.

Heero chased his baka's lips before sucking--sucking was goood--his baka's tongue back into his mouth to nibble on. Duo groaned again, inarticulately, into his mouth. He rubbed himself against his baka. Not just his cock--cock! cock! cock!--but his whole body. His nipples felt incredibly heated when his baka's chest stimulated them. His hands clenched and his baka groaned again. He suddenly discovered that if he pulled on his baka's butt and thrust upward at the same time, the friction on his cock sent tracer rounds of pure fire rocketing from his groin, through his spine, and across his eyelids. He did it again and it was ah! His baka whimpered and ground himself down onto Heero. His baka was hot. Yes. Hot. So was his cock. And his baka's cock. And it was goood. And the rockets were blowing themselves up in his brain and it felt like nothing but his baka's cock. His baka shifted and suddenly they were fully cock to cock to thrust to oooh! He couldn't keep track of his baka's tongue because the only thing left in his entire existence was his cock and his baka's heat. And the rockets in his brain. They were exploding like hot, wet semen all over himself. There was a low, groaning growl somewhere and he couldn't get his tongue into his baka's mouth far enough. And he couldn't move, just jerk. And thrust. And cock. And and and black....

His internal clock put it at about three minutes 24 seconds later when he blinked his eyes open and tried to focus on a smirking not-princess inches from his face. He felt lassitude. And lethargic. His baka licked his lips for him and the smirk shifted to a soft smile. "How do you feel?"

Heero blinked. "Hot."

The smirk came back. "You're hot as fuck, baby, and that ain't no lie."

He decided that the smirk was cute and such cuteness required kissing. He lifted his head, though his brain was still reeling a little, and let his lips touch his baka's. They clung and shifted slowly, building another fire in the pit of his belly, right above the spot where his cock was throbbing in time to his pulse and right below the spot where he was all sticky and musky. His baka ground down again, rubbing his erection into the corner of Heero's thigh and pelvis. It felt good. Very good.

His baka took charge of their kiss, tangling his tongue with Heero's. He blinked at the glazed purple eyes and the reflexively jerking hips beneath his palms. He sucked on his baka's tongue and his baka moaned. It was a heady feeling, just as good as a successful ninmu kanryu, so he did it again. He wanted to hear more. He arched into his baka's thrusting and relished the whiny moan that accompanied the move. Were there more sounds? How many different moans of pleasure could his baka make?

"Ninmu ryoukai," he whispered against his baka's lips.

The purple eyes blinked slowly. "Huh?"

He ignored that and nipped at Duo's jaw just as Duo had done to him moments ago. His baka arched his neck and groaned. He tried sucking, but the bone of the mandible only invited his teeth back. He licked a little lower, running his tongue over his baka's jugular and decided that the breathy moan he got for that was the best so far. He tried sucking and got a low whine and a hard thrust of the hips.

The data from the sex manuals and the things that Zechs and Trowa had told him came flooding back now that his mind was clear enough to access the information. There were many things he wanted to try out on his baka and now was the perfect time to do so. At least while he was still able to concentrate. The idea that his baka could kill his concentration just by taking his clothes off didn't bother him nearly as much as it probably should have. Just to be safe, he decided not to include this tidbit of information in his report.

Sliding his tongue back into his baka's mouth to keep him from complaining about this top and bottom business, Heero rolled them over. There was no complaint, just a low moan as his body settled onto Duo's. He wriggled a little, to feel the friction of Duo against him. They both moaned. He liked that, but not as much as the breathy moan. Licking his baka's neck didn't get him another one, but rolling his tongue down to lave at his baka's nipples got him a long, drawn out ooooh that he felt all the way down in his groin. He tried sucking it, then sucking it while teasing it with the tip of his tongue. Duo whimpered and shoved his pelvis hard into Heero. More. He wanted more from his baka. He wanted....

He abruptly shifted down, sliding the length of his body against Duo's heated skin, until he was head to head with Duo's cock. Duo's hands threaded into Heero's hair and he moaned again. "God, Heero, yeah, do it."

Heero took a deep breath to steel himself and found it to be musky in a hot, masculine baka way. He liked it; it sent delicious shivers racing down his spine. Chasing the sensation, he nuzzled against the shaft and discovered that it felt surprisingly soft. The skin felt as delicate as tissue and moved freely over the hardness beneath. Was this what his baka had felt like in the dressing room, with Heero's cock running along his cheek?

"C'mon, Heero, suck me." Trust his baka to phrase a request as a whiny order.

He rubbed his lips back and forth along the underside of the shaft, enjoying the feel of skin to skin. His tongue slid out before he could give it any orders concerning this mission and the taste of his baka's cock shot straight to his own. He licked again and savored it. His baka wiggled and thrust, his fingers clawing into Heero's hair. "Heero!"

Did his baka's cock taste the same all over? Ninmu ryoukai. He started logically, at the bottom, and covered every centimeter of skin before he ended up at the top. The shaft was pretty much the same from the base, where he had to pause to hack up a pubic hair that seemed determined to remain stuck to the back of his palate, to halfway up. From there, the taste was a little less salty until about an inch below the head where it sharpened along with the scent of seminal fluid. The head itself tasted quite different, richer and wet. Throughout his brief mission, his baka had relentlessly pulled his hair and demanded that Heero take it into his mouth. He considered telling his baka that doing so was against mission parameters, but he couldn't remove his tongue from his baka's flesh long enough to do it.

Zechs and the manuals had described an activity known as "deep throating". When he'd heard about it, he hadn't understood its appeal. Pushing a penis into his throat had seemed contradictory to good health practices. The esophagus had not been designed to accept large, solid objects. It had been designed for chewed, somewhat fluid things. After all, the gag reflex existed for a purpose. Now, with his lips wrapped around the head of Duo's cock and his tongue lapping up the dripping seminal fluid, Heero was suddenly taken with the idea of this deep throating activity. His baka's whimpering and moaning indicated that he would like it as well. Ninmu ryoukai. Taking a deep breath, he pushed his head down, letting his baka penetrate his mouth.

"Fuck, Heero! That's it, baby, suck me!"

He was displeased to find out that the was doing it wrong. He pulled his mouth off--his baka whined about that--and then started again, from the tip. This time, instead of simply pushing, he sucked. His cheeks faintly ached, his mandibular joints felt slightly sore, and the sucking action interfered with the length of time he would be able to hold his breath, but the reaction from his baka was well worth the discomfort. Duo moaned, gasped, and panted. His body writhed, shivered, and jerked. His hands rubbed, petted, and tugged.

When the tip of his baka's cock nudged at his tonsils, he stopped. While wrestling his need to gag into submission, he methodically sorted through all of the information he'd collected on the act of deep throating. It wasn't quite as simple as he'd thought it might be when reading mission parameters on the subject. His throat was not cooperating with his efforts and it was an irritant.

"God, Heero, move. Quit teasing!"

He hadn't completed his deep throating mission yet, so his baka would simply have to be patient. He would have explained the mission parameters his baka was required to follow, but he could not do so with the end of his baka's cock lodged up against his epiglottis. He grabbed his baka's hips firmly in his hands and forced him to hold perfectly still. He pushed downward a little, the thick head of his baka's cock shouldering his tonsils aside and sliding deeper. He pushed at it with his tongue, trying to change the angle a bit.

"Heero!" His baka jerked in his hands, shoving into his throat a little more, then jerking back. "Fuck! Heero! Please!"

Please? Heero pulled his mouth off his baka's cock and blinked. Please?

"Oh fuck, don't stop now. Please, Heero, suck me off. C'mon, don't leave me hanging." There was a definite pleading tone in the voice.

He liked it. A lot. He immediately discarded Mission Deep Throat and instituted Mission Make Baka Beg in its place.

Experimenting with different applications of his mouth, tongue, breath, fingers, and hands, he discovered that he could make his baka whine, beg, and plead as well as make the most deliciously interesting range of noises in various volumes. Different pressures and speed of stroking, particularly with his mouth, could bring his baka to the brink of orgasm and simply by releasing his cock and breathing on it, Heero could hold him there, body taut, for a while. He wasn't sure exactly how long because he found it impossible to track his internal clock when given the sight of his Duo straining for his pleasure. He wanted to see that every day for the rest of his life.

He discovered, by accident, that he could apply both oral and manual stimulation to his baka's cock simultaneously. He recalled reading this in the manuals, but listening to his baka's sexual arousal had occupied most of his attention for quite some time. He couldn't find it within himself to be contrite over the error. At least not at the moment. At the moment, with his lips wrapped around Duo's cock, his tongue massaging the underside, his hand lazily moving along the shaft, his baka was begging so sweetly. "Please, Heero, let me cum. I'll do anything! Please! Please! It hurts...."

Hurts! Heero immediately set about making his baka cum. His baka was not permitted to hurt. Speed and pressure were the things his baka responded to. He tightened the hold his lips had on the upper portion of the shaft and he set his hand into purposeful motion with quick, sure strokes along the rest of it. He eased himself upwards, off of his baka's pelvis to allow him freedom to move as he would. His baka chose to writhe and jerk, attempting to bury his cock as deeply into Heero's mouth as Heero would permit, over and over again. His baka sobbed and moaned his name. And he liked that more than anything else his baka said. His own cock twitched and he rubbed it against his baka's leg. It felt good, but not as good as it had earlier.

"Heero!" His baka's body arched and tensed. In his mouth, his baka's cock expanded and shuddered, abruptly filling his mouth with salty fluid. Semen, he identified hazily.

Now that Duo had orgasmed and no longer hurt, he crawled up his baka's body and thrust his erection against his baka's thigh. He wanted sex. Now. His baka was mildly unconscious--the manuals had warned of the possibility so he wasn't concerned--so he waited, pressing small kisses along his baka's jaw and cheek. As soon as Duo came to, they were going to have sex. Heero planned on putting his own cock inside of his baka as soon as possible.

After eight minutes and thirty two seconds, his baka blinked glazed, purple eyes open. He had been gently rubbing himself against Duo's hip and thigh, waiting as patiently as possible with a demanding erection between his legs. His baka twisted his head and offered him a sexy, sappy smile. He leaned down and kissed it, pleased to feel his tongue meet Duo's in the middle. He closed his eyes and gave himself over to the sensation of the kiss. He thrust his tongue inside of his baka's mouth, exactly as he intended to thrust himself inside of his baka's body. Hard, slick, and tender. Curling his tongue gently, he moaned when Duo sucked on it.

His hands slid along his baka's body, from the hard planes of his shoulder blades, down the dip of his lower back, to cup the rounded expanse of what he considered to be the most perfect set of buttocks in the entire Earth Sphere. Not only were they perfect, they were his. He hadn't gotten the forsake all other and keep myself only unto Heero Yuy, Pilot 01 forever and ever vow just yet, but he would. His fingers found the inward curve between his baka's butt cheeks and set about gently exploring. There was a hole there, an entrance to Duo's body that he had to prepare. He had mission plans already in motion for this part of sex. He had researched carefully and his fingers were trembling even though he hadn't penetrated--penetrated!!--his baka just yet. His baka moaned into his mouth and wriggled, moving onto his fingers.

Gently, he parted those perfect cheeks and rubbed the little hole. Little being the operative word. While he was still uncertain as to the exact nature of his hungness, other than he was perfect according to Duo, he was having a difficult time believing that this little hole, which seemed smaller in diameter than his index finger, could accommodate the entire width of his erect penis. The books and Zechs both insisted that it could be done to great pleasure for Duo. His cock was insisting that it ought to be done immediately. Duo didn't appear to mind, he was moaning, smiling, and wriggling.

Slowly, he wormed the tip of his finger inside, just the tip. He knew he needed proper lubrication, but he'd left his carefully purchased supplies in the other room. He was aware that saliva would do, if necessary, and suddenly thought of rimming. He had been promised that this activity would make it much, much easier to penetrate his baka. Before he could think about it, he shifted down again, his goal a little bit farther back. He hiked his baka's legs over his shoulders and angled his baka's hips to present that little hole to best advantage.

"Heero? What are you--" his breath washed over Duo's upturned posterior. "Ooooooh."

Before notions of sanitation could get a foot hold in his mind, he stuck his tongue out and--

The door exploded open. "Yuy! Maxwell! Time to evacuate. Oz is two clicks from our present location." Wufei paused. "Yuy, that works better if you lift his backside up more. You'll get a stiff neck that way."

on to chapter 19

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